Digital Rules
by Da-Tenshi Setsuna
Summary: A set of rules made by my favorite Demon Lords: Lucemon and Beelzemon, about the people they know, fans, animes, movies, enemies, daily life etc. WARNING: Beware of insanity! The rest of the cast will also make their comments.
1. Demon Lords' Rules, First Set

I got that idea after reading some rules in the Supernatural and Harry Potter category. I don't own Beelze nor Luce (damn it). The story is cannon to my Digimon FF series. Beware of randomness and insanity! LOL XD

_**BTW, this ain't in script format!**_

At least, I think it ain't. ?.? (Puzzled)

;P

* * *

**01. Entry**

**Demon Lords' Rules, First Set**

Simply said, _Beelzemon_ and **Lucemon** deceided to have their fun.

**#01 **

When something goes wrong, blame it on Lucemon.

**"Wait, what?!"**

_"Yo, yer the leader. And the eldest. So yer responsible for all we do."_

**"No, I'm not!"**

Beelzemon falls on the ground, bursting out laughing and holding his stomache. Lucemon has a puzzled look on his face.

_"Dude, you just admited yer not the leader!"_

Lucemon frowns.

**"Damn."**

**#02 **

Don't bother to knock on the door which leads to Barb's Library.

**"I'm talking to you Beelzemon!"**

_"What? All I did was knocking on the door."_

**"And scratched it."**

_"Ain't my fault Barb's deaf. And I WON'T pay for the repairs!"_

**#03 **

Avoid Lilith at all costs when she's in her 'Everything's Pink' Mood

Beelzemon and Lucemon gulp.

**_"Agreed on that one."_**

**#04 **

Don't ya DARE to touch Behemoth.

_"Just as a reminder, Barb has still nightmares of demonic tires on his face."_

**#05 **

Don't touch any of Barb's stuff.

**"I won't even comment how stupid that is."**

**#06 **

Don't piss Daemon off.

**"He's not called Demon Lord of Wrath without reason."**

**#07 **

Don't ask Lucemon to sing Anthem of the Angels.

**"Coz Luce can't sing!"**

Beelzemon drops on the ground, laughing. Lucemon frowns.

_"I can!"_

**"Lemme hear it."**

Silence.

_"Yeah, that was good."_ sarcastic comment from Beelzemon's side.

**"I don't know the lyrics."**

**#08 **

Don't step between Gallantmon and Beelzemon while they're having a battle.

_"Coz ye'll end up with a lance and a bullet in yer ass."_

**#09 **

Don't make a bet with Belph who can longer stay up awake.

**"Belph's a BAD loser."**

**#10 **

Don't call Gallantmon 'Knightrider of Doom'. He won't be amused. At all.

_"Arisa thought that would be a good nickname, though."_

**#11 **

Tai and hen don't make Hentai. That's something else.

_"Something I was forbbiden to talk about."_

**"Who told you that?"**

_"Arisa. She shuddered when she read some of the Fanfics. Poor girl had nightmares for a whole week."_

**#12 **

Don't walk into Levia's mouth. He ain't a submarine nor Whamon.

**"Who the hell thought of that?"**

_"The same dude who watched Digimon Adventure. And who just got eaten."_

**#13 **

Piedmon (the Dark Master, not Brian's partner) is an idiotic clown look-alike with territory and arrogance issues.

_"Ya know, the description fits ya too. Only that you ain't a Dark Master."_

**"Why you-!?"**

**#14 **

Don't snatch away the food under Beelzemon's nose.

_"Again, yer end up with a bullet in yer ass. Or a ton of them."_

**#15 **

Alphamon has no sense of humour.

_"Actually, all Royal Knights don't."_

**"Agreed."**

**#16 **

Nor do the Souvereings.

_"Especially Zhuqiaomon."_

**"Dully noted."**

**#17 **

Or the Celestial Angels.

**"Watch out for Phany. She's a furry."**

_"Lilith as well."_

Both shudder.

**TBC...**


	2. Demon Lords' Rules, Second Set

Thanks everyone for the reviews. I also accept ideas (it ain't that easy to make up the rules).

Now, the next category us dedicated to all fans of Supernatural as well as all fans of silliness and randomness. (Is it just me or did I really sound like Rob Drydek from Ridiculousness?)

* * *

**02. Entry**

**Demon Lords' Rules, Second Set**

_Rules about Supernatural (The TV Show), Supernatural in General, _

_Random Stuff and Bill Gates_

**#01 **

Comparing Digimon and Supernatural is awkward.

**_"Agreed."_**

**#02 **

Nobody is allowed to call the Demon Lords by the names of the demons they represent.

**"So cut out the Satan crap!"**

_"Okay, Lucy!"_

**"Shut up!"**

**#03 **

Don't refer to Dragomon as Our Lord Cthlulhu. Or the Giant Squid.

_"Can we do that behind his back?"_

**"Dunno. Guess we can, although he hates it."**

_"Wonder why."_

**#04 **

Witchmon or Wizardmon won't melt if you throw a bucket full of water at them.

_"How about throwing only the bucket at them?"_

**"Good idea!"**

**#05 **

DO NOT let Coronamon (the Olympus XII and Shawn's partner) anywhere near the kitchen.

**"Last time he cooked his Corona Surprise everything went KABLOEY!"**

_"I liked the fireworks."_

**#06 **

Arisa is awesome!

Signed: Beelzemon.

**#07 **

Akinari is awesome!

Signed: Lucemon.

**#08 **

The Shadow Tamers are awesome!

Signed: Lucemon and Beelzemon (in the name of the Demon Lords).

**#09 **

Zyra is awesome!

Signed: Zyra Araki.

**#10 **

Zyra, this is our Rules List!

Signed: Beelzemon and Lucemon.

**#11 **

Okay.

(Blows a raspberry.)

**#12 **

Shinzui rules!

Signed: Shinzui.

**#13 **

Beelzemon, cut it out with the graffities in my books!

Signed: A very angry Barbamon.

**#14 **

And the water filled balloons!

Signed: A very angry Daemon.

**#15 **

Emphasize rule Number 4 of Demon Lords' Rules, First Set: DO NOT TOUCH BEHEMOTH!

**"Barb again?"**

_"Yep."_

**#16 **

Don't ya DARE to give Lilith that damn whistle!

_"My ears still hurt."_

**#17 **

If you ever get lost in the Dark Area, go forwards to the Decayed Forest, then turn left and go forwards with your eyes closed.

_"Wait, ain't at the end of the road a giant abbys?"_

**"So what?"**

**#18 **

Trying to summon any of the Demon Lords into a Devil's Trap is a STUPID IDEA!

**"It won't work. This ain't Supernatural."**

_"Besides, half of 'em are like Fallen Angels. It won't work."_

**#19 **

The same applies for trying to find Bakemon's bones to salt and burn them.

_"Again, they don't have corpses."_

**"But they can turn you into one."**

**#20 **

The Dark Area ain't a shortcut to Hell.

**"Nor do we live nearby the Cage."**

**#21 **

There is no Digimon called Cassmon.

_**"We apologize to all fangirls."**_

**#22 **

Keep Etemon away from the karaoke set!

**"That's not a rule. That's an ORDER!"**

**#23 **

Bill Gates ain't the human creator of the DigiWorld.

_"So quit callin' him Yggdrassil!"_

**#24 **

Bill Gates ain't our version of Chuck either.

**"And quit calling him D-Chuck!"**

**#25 **

Devimon ain't crossroad demons. Don't atempt to make a deal with them.

_"Or kiss them."_

**#26 **

Fangirls are not allowed to visit the Dark Castle.

Written by Arisa and Zyra. We have guns and katanas and we're not afraid to use them.

**#27 **

DeviDramon ain't appropriate for pulling carriges.

**"That only works in the TV."**

**#28 **

The Gate of the Seven Deadly Sins dosen't lead to the Cage.

_"I wish it would. Ack!"_

Beelzemon gets pinned in a headlock by Lucemon.

**#29 **

It is not allowed to call the Shadow Tamers 'The Chosen Vessels'.

**"It's just awkward."**

**#30 **

Renamon's nickname (which Beelzemon made) is Foxy or Fox-face.

**"Why not Firefox or Poker-face?"**

_"Coz she ain't an internet browser nor a girl from a Lady Gaga spot."_

**"She has the poker face though."**

**#31 **

The DigiDestenied are all morons.

_"The anime cast or the ones who killed us?"_

**"Both."**

**#32 **

We are not allowed to tell newcomer students to the Digimon Academy that Wazashi-sensei and Babamon are the Voice of God.

_"It was Zyra's idea!"_

**"Yeah, great. Just blame the poor girl."**

**#33 **

There's no Digimon called Santamon.

**"Beelze, you'll make a lot of kids sad this year."**

_"Well, we have a Digimon called Bunnymon. Makes up for it."_

**#34 **

Humming Anthem of the Angels when Lucemon's around is allowed.

_"I'm gonna make it his theme song."_

**#35 **

Making theme songs is a bad idea.

This one was written by Zyra. Lucemon is kinda busy trying to kill Beelzemon for annoying him.

**#36 **

You are not allowed to call Duskmon the Dark Lord.

_"No, he's the Dark Spirit."_

**#37 **

The Olympus XII ain't the real pagan deities.

**"So no deals with them."**

_"And no human sacrisfices. Or digital."_

**#38 **

Finally, ya are NOT allowed makin' any Supernatural references!

_"Suck it, ya **idjits!**"_

Lucemon looks at Beelzemon with an awkward look on his face. Beelzemon is rather confused.

_"What?"_

Lucemon facepalms.

**TBC...**


	3. Demon Lords' Rules, Fifth Set

I want to thank and share the credits with **PsycoFanGirl **who wrote the first five rules. The rest is mine. I'm sorry for the chapter being short, but I kinda lack ideas and I was focused on my other FF (namely Digimon Academy). I promise that the next one will be longer.

* * *

**03. Entry**

**Demon Lords' Rules, Fifth Set**

**(You heard it right!)**

"Wait, what happened to the third and fourth set?" asked Lucemon.

"Well, the third was acidentally destroyed and the fourth was acidentally burned on purpose." said Beelzemon.

"I don't get it." said Lucemon.

"Well, someone spilled some liquid over the disc with the third set of rules." said Beelzemon, eyeing Leviamon who just stood around, whistling innocently.

"What?!" Leviamon snapped. "Wait, what am I doing here?"

"And the fourth set..." Beelzemon continued. "was hacked by Ken, Wormmon, Dean, Veemon, Akita and Dorumon, who had their fun with it."

"I hope you did manage to get revenge on them." said Lucemon.

"Oh, I did." Beelzemon grinned slyly.

_Somewhere at DigiCity..._

"NOOOOOOOOO!"

**xXx**

"Anyways, what did you do?" asked **Lucemon**.

"Let's say so: Seichi caused Ken's computer to crash down and delete everything on it." _Beelzemon_ replied with a chuckle.

Anyways, back to the rules.

**#01**  
Do not refer to Phany as "Phanpy".

_"You will be brutally scolded by either Ophanimon herself or Lilithmon."_

**"Not just because you referred to her as a "Pokémon" but also because Lilith (and a select handful of people/Digimon) are allowed to call her that."**

**#02**

Do not attempt to grab Gulimon by the tail in attempt to swing him around like Super Mario with Bowser.

_"The princess is anyways in another castle and your only causing trouble."_

**#03**  
Just because previously mentioned "princess" is in another castle does NOT mean she is in Dark Castle.

**"Also Lilith is not the princess."**

**#04**  
Giving Beelzemon permission to draw on Belphmon's face as funny as it is/was, is not longer allowed after the incident where Beezlemon actually used permanent marker to write inappropriate things about everyone he hates.

Everyone mentioned glares at Beelzemon. Beelze gulps, sweatdropping.

**#05**  
The above also applies with Beelzemon doodling on the walls of any building or vicinity.

_"Hey, it happened just one time! And it wasn't that bad!"_

**"You, along with Dracmon, painted Zhuqiaomon's castle pink and also wrote 'Impmon and Dracmon rule!'"**

_"So that's how they figured out it we did it."_

Lucemon slaps his forehead.

**#06**  
The Dark Castle is not Hogwarts. We won't send you any invitations. Only if it's an invitation to your death party.

**"And if you see a Wizardmon wandering around it, don't expect to see Harry Potter as well."**

_"Yeah, coz that Wizardmon is searching for our blood."_

**"To awake the Dark Lord."**

Both burst out laughing. Nearby, Dynasmon is cracking his knuckles with a frown on his face.

_Several minutes and two painful yells leater..._

Dynasmon calmly exites the Dark Castle. Back inside, Beelzemon and Lucemon are lying on the ground with bumps on their heads.

**#07**  
Never piss off Dynasmon.

**_"Agreed."_**

**#08**  
Don't ever go near that being which hisses, has claws, bites everything, has wings and looks plain horrible.

**"Daemon?"**

_"I meant Lilith on a bad morning."_

**#09**  
Don't ever EVER assume that Beelzemon can't read.

_"I'll find the one who used a can of spray and wrote 'Beelzemon's a moron!' on the wall in my room."_

Dracmon whistles innocently, kicking away the can which was behind him.

**#10**  
We won't give away our e-mail adress, adress of the Dark Castle or phone number.

_"Do you guys have an idea how many fangirls are there waiting to get us? Better safe than sorry."_

**"Speaking of which, I didn't know we had a phone. I mean, I get the computer, which Seichi instaled a few weeks ago, but the phone?"**

Beelzemon is silent for a few seconds. He then slaps his forehead. Lucemon sweatdrops.

**"Lemme guess: we don't have a phone."**

**TBC...**


	4. Quick Announcement

Due to lack of ideas, I deceided to create a new FF and put this one under COMPLETED. I'm sorry to dissapoint everyone who hoped for a new chapter of silliness and randomness, but I hope you'll like the new FF I'll soon post.

* * *

**Quick Announcement! **

Hi, I'm Shinzui, and most of you probably know me. Well, due Beelzemon and Lucemon having written several rules which practicaly insulted all people they know, they're currently away, trying to hide themselves from the angry mob. That means that the Digital Rules will be permanently canceled. I'm sorry about that people.

However, there are some good news. A new show shall soon start, which will feature the Demon Lords and their lifes, as well as the lifes of the people with whom they interact. I believe some of the rules here will also be realized and everything will take place in some sort of alternate universe, which may or may not feature some other familiar characters.

**So, stay tuned for:**

**ZONE OF THE DEMON LORDS!**


End file.
